My 5 o'clock shadow.

No I'm not developing a beard, although once in a while my tweezers would beg to differ. I am referring to the time of day when my motivation and body seems to just shut down.
It is, of course, the busiest time of the day for me, homework, dinner, quickly cleaning so as to make it appear I've been busy ALL day :) Yet my inner motivator (dressed in a striped, lycra, unitard and Reebok high tops) seems to have clocked off for the night. Maybe it's my 240 mg of caffeine I devour during the day that's worn off. I can't figure it out but it's like clockwork.
Any suggestions?

You can take fry's away but....

you can't stop me loving the spuds!!

My Silent Journey Back.

It seems when we embark on something new or hard we are all excited and enthusiastic, only to find that when we meet a hiccup or road block, we quit and shy away with our tail between our legs. We feel like a failure and stop believing we can achieve things.
We know people are watching and feel embarrassed, somehow accountable to them.
I believe the journey is full of hills and bumps and the warrior is the one who gets back on the road, silently ploughing through the roadblocks.
Today I feel like that warrior, moving forward, slowly, not shouting but with head down and collar up.
I WILL MAKE IT through this journey, with only me on my side and in my shoes and will listen for the voice that constantly, but so quietly, whispers to me, "yes you can!" and I will believe him, because HE knows me.

Dance like no one is watching.

Today was my first day back at the gym. I know with my new rock hard abs you would wonder why I would choose that as my first priority after getting my kids back in school (hallelujah 13 weeks of summer...too long) but I'm afraid 5 weeks of sitting on butt, bored and consoling self with godiva's dark chocolate with orange pieces in, takes it's toll on say, batwings, cheeks, legs and butt tocks (said with Forest Gump accent, cool movie, watched it last night)
So I went for my favorite class, DANCE JAM and seriously, this is the coolest class ever. In a room with 30+ ladies, surrounded by mirrors yet we shake it and roll it and dance like we are the finalist of so you think you can dance, cos we ALL do. THINK we can, HA HA. More than half the class is over 35 and we jam to everything, anything.
I love it.
I can wear a head band and spandex if I choose. Luckily I don't choose.

There's no rules no judgment and everyone leaves happy and uplifted and yes we have done the flash dance fast knee with train arms thing :)see I know technical names.

Mummy Makeover.

Well you asked for it.
After many years of desire and selling my harley, I chose B and It has been 3 weeks.
Sorry no pictures on this blog :)
I have several friends who have done this. I say friends because when some associate from your ward or gym is willing to flash you there stuff on request, I think it makes us friends. Be warned, ladies with new perky boobs will often show you there stuff even when you don't ask or just have them on full display at the local pool behind a small piece of fabric and string. You know you've mumbled about there fake Knockers but really would love to buy a swimsuit based on it's cuteness rather than it's ability to hold up the girls. I digress.
So I researched different docs, each with there specialty. I looked at many before and after pics ( shocking and gross but comforting to know I am not alone in the before, horror shot.) I was concerned with recommendation, experience, manner, pictures, after care, pain management and generally how I felt. Not so concerned with cost since they were all close.
I was surprised how different each place was despite the procedure being similar.
My biggest fear was pain. I would've done this years ago but since I had heard descriptions like "I begged my husband to shoot me in the face to put me out of my misery!" I was pretty apprehensive. Dr Bishop had me at "you will have a pain pump flowing a constant anaesthetic to the area for 5 days :)" SOLD!!!!
I also chose him cos on one of before mentioned flashing's, I observed that his experience with stitching hands meant his scars were virtually invisible.

So I paid my money and waited a month for the big day. I didn't mention it to hardly anyone because I thought if even a slight doubt was placed in front of me I would've bailed.
So why am I telling of my secret now? Actually, I am just relieved and impressed to report it wasn't as bad as I imagined. I had the surgery AM,it took 5 hours and by evening time I was standing and into a chair, where I stayed over night in a really nice facility at the riverwoods. I had one on one nurses care and plenty of morphine. I was smiling on my way out of there just 24 hours later.


I spent the first few days asleep in a recliner thanks to drugs and my sweet hubby taking care of everything and by day 5 I was returning to the docs for my first check and dreaded drain and pump removal.
It turned out the pain drugs had worn off and I had already gone past the worst so at this point Ibuprofen was all I needed. Yes on day 5!
The removal of pumps however was a definite gag me moment.
You know when your at the "bugs life" 4D show in Disney and the slug runs under your butt...well imagine felling it pulled right across your body under the skin. Nuf said.
So from there on it's, try to stand up straight, don't cough or sneeze, lower back ache from being bent over. Cabin fever, totally rubbish TV and a house that looks in need of a Mum even though sweet hubby has busted a gut to keep on top of stuff.

Was it worth it? Honestly it's too early to say. My inability to work out has left me a bit negative, I rely on that for my happy feelings. The scar itself is a bit lumpy and unsightly as expected but I still have stretch marks above it so it's not like I'm clean and clear after all this. My skin above the incision is numb and feels thick like a whale when I touch it, they say that feeling will return.To top it off I haven't had a good nights sleep since I stopped the big drugs.
Ask me in 3 weeks and I'm sure I will be all better.

On a plus side, my boobs look blooming fantastic, like a teenager! I'll show you if you like :) KIDDING!!

To tell or NOT to tell.....

That is the question?
So I wonder how many people read this blog anyway but I have seriously considered this next post.
The Mummy Makeover! You know what I'm talking about. The extreme kind where you try to get your body back to it's pre- mummy state.
It's something I have considered for years. My very first baby left me with stretch marks from naval to hoo ha, a 3 inch roll of skin over my belt and boobs I could've tied in a bow (sorry to shatter any illusions of me)and so here I am 18 years and 3 babies later. My options are:
A) Refill said skin and boob sacks with all kinds of nummy fat food (trust me I've tried this option, one big mac in each bra.
B) Visit an experienced, well trained and sometimes a bit excentric doctor to take care of it.
Which would you choose?
So after diet, excersice and much thought,I'm ready to tell the tale if anyone's interested.

Thank you subway.

There are so many choices for "fast food" out there and even with the best intentions, a "FAT addict" will struggle with every drive thru window.
Sometimes we just have to grab on the run and so I need to give a shout out to subway for there "kids fit pack"
4 inch turkey sub on wheat, no cheese, loaded with veggies, only salt and pepper maybe some spicy mustard.
Then get apples and some baked lays (southwest ranch are yummy)
and low fat milk or water.
Around $4 not too shabby. A nice balance, not too much bread.
This picture is my at home lunch rendition.

My new MLM program.

So I'm on this awesome new program, It's called get your lazy butt to the gym and stop eating crap.
All you have to do is
1, get your lazy ass to the gym & I don't just mean walk in and out.
2, stop eating crap.

The best bit is, if you sign up 10 people to do it with you, you'll get positive healthy friends. You could even earn a trip to the swimsuit store.

So i'm gonna call everyone I've ever made eye contact with and spam all mine and your facebook friends to let them know about my awesome program.

Don't avoid my calls, just remember...

GET YOUR LAZY BUTT TO THE GYM AND STOP EATING CRAP!!

Again!

So I hate to say Day 1, but back on track hopefully and the topic of todays meeting was in fact Tracking.
Put away your pencil, this isn't just a "write it down thing" but get your head out of your oversized butt and be honest about your intake. If something says Zero points does it mean it doesn't exist, that you didn't actually eat it? Let me put it another way, if your wearing a size zero clothes, are you a non person (well pretty much) but no it means you have to shop in the kids section. So rethink the zero points and keep track, eventually they will add up to numbers. Zero sized people can only hope they grow up to have real ladies bodies with curves and all (Hey, I'm just jealous really).
So measure, weigh, count, write, get back on track.
They best thing she said today was this is about "SELF GOVERN" it is my body, my desire to stay healthy, my excuses, my bad math;)My Fat a.. that won't fit in my jeans.
Good luck.

Here we go again.

I weighed in this morning and it wasn't pretty :( (even if my outfit was )
So I donned my "got chocolate T", the non fattening substitute and have stepped back on the waggon with an egg and oatmeal breakfast and a gallon of water.
So long diet coke and nachos, until we meet again in a few weeks ;)

I seem to have fallen off the wagon!!
I mean every principle is out the window.
HELP ME.

I'm such a looser!

Another 1.8lbs!!
What's weird is that 10 weeks ago, I was really hopeful about loosing 5lb and thought 10lb would be awesome. 15lb was a pipe dream and if I got there I'd be ecstatic, a total hottie!! Thing is, I'm only 1.2lb away and I don't feel any different. I mean, the scale is not as scary but I still see all my flaws when I look in the mirror. Are we ever really satisfied? Is this what they call "dysmorphia"?
Luckily, I watch "what not to wear" almost as much as I browse the IKEA cataloge so I can fake looking good, but I still rely on people to give a look when I get a little out of hand in the clothes.

Like when my Mum told me I looked weird with blond hair :)
She was right!!!

I'm officially a HO!!

I have always been able to loose weight when focused and strict and working out like a maniac but as you can imagine, that level of discipline is not always maintained. After the goals are met or an obstacle gets in my way, like for instance, I'm hungry, that pie looks good, it's too cold to get naked and work out....you can add your own excuse here, the weight tends to creep back up.
So I have been sick of late, haven't worked out or eaten great for a few weeks and the real downfall is how much I enjoy my extra activity points, however I have continued to count and stuck to my original allowance and low and behold I reached my next 2 goals. That's 10lbs off ( 12lbs actually) and lifetime membership, yeah no more $$$. So I'm officially a HO. What do you mean I already was? So now the hard part. 3lbs to Hotness but maintain maintain maintain.
Can I get a HaaaY....HooooO!!!!

My name is Natalie and I'm a foodaholic....

Hello Natalie.
Well it seems the very reason I joined weight watchers has hit me today like a bag of very well flavored potato chips along with a bag (or 2) of chocolate buttons.
Of course I wanted to loose a few pounds but really I wanted a lifestyle change of healthy habits i could sustain while not feeling guilty for the odd treat.
As long as the rule "you bite it, you write it" stuck firm.
Truth is since my trip I haven't been writing, counting or eating right.
The good news is, I'm still at my goal while having this wake up call so I don't plan on taking that trip up again. The meeting leader gave us a paper to fill out from the ww tools for living to empower us, so I'm filling it out.
It states:
1, that my goals ARE worth the effort
2,I AM capable of achieving them
3,I deserve and am worthy to achieve them.

so lets re-group, set some real goals and continue to HOT status :)

Random picture of my gorgeous Mum cos I was told you had to have pics :0

My week in England.

As per my last entry, I knew my week in England would be challenging, after all I am surrounding by things that I might be able to resist if they were available but since most of them are not, I had to have!!! So I decided I would eat whatever I felt like and try to keep track of points to see just how many I could consume but most meals I took a round 30 and quit counting by noon :)
It was a very eventful week filled with family and a funeral but I'll leave those reports for my family blog.
So now for pics.

First and most importantly, I found out I could get to "in n out" burger between flights by taking a carpark bus :) what an adventure. Those are the best fries ever!!
68 degrees, cool breeze and a cheese burger, animal style, man I feel the need to repent:)

This was my air meal, I wonder how anyone traveling can keep track of points, I mean I had no idea, what was in any of these little packages but I figure, having to sit in the same tiny seat for 12 hours straight is probably motivation enough to not overeat and need to count.

This is sugar heaven or what the devils house might look like. Each jar is filled with about 10lb of one candy. you buy it by the 1/4lb usually and the shop keeper pours the sweets into a little paper bag. I of course went in American style and got a whole jar of one of my faves (for my whole family)this may have been the reason my bag was overweight but I was happy to pay.

Finally my favorite meal from a store cafe. It may not look tempting to most but to a Brit it is the symbol of all things English. Proper sausages, chips, cauliflower (cos we believe in eating veg) all in a Yorkshire pudding drenched in gravy....

did I mention the amazing chocolate, bags of crisps, chinese food, kebabs...
now to weigh in :-(

How do I do England on a weight watcher budget?

When people ask me if I miss England, I usually say, I miss my family and the food.
I love there bread, chips, chocolate, fish and chips, kebabs, even Mcdonalds is different, imagine a mcflurry made with cadbury's mini eggs and you have my idea of heaven. So that's my dilemma.
Since the exchange rate for money is $1.47 I figured I could use an exchange on my ww points :) 22 would be 33! Oh wait it goes the other way. Any suggestions?

YES! you can.

This phrase is repeated many times by my over excited trainer Kaycee at Lifetime fitness.


I love this girl!! She is always happy and positive and has wise words to share that seem to touch me.
She talks of us being in a safe place there, filling and covering ourselves with positive energy. She loves to dance and cracks me up cos she can't help shaking it when a hot tune comes on (even if we're in the middle of a really tough set). Her smile is infectious and I always feel better when I'm done. Now don't get me wrong, she's no push over, pansy trainer! I have the butt pain to prove it :)
But I just wanted to say thanks to her and all the other people out there who work so hard to make others feel good about themselves. Officer Jenn (would happily kick your a.. at a moments notice) Andrea cute hair(ran into in costco once and recommended the vitamix, most used gadget in my kitchen, sorry about the shoulder)Hiedi energizer bunny (I want some of what she's having :) Seriously, my day is better because of this place.

Start strong Mondays.

For the last....I don't know how long, I've been getting an email titled Start strong Mondays, from Shawn Phillips (brother of very successful Bill Phillips, founder of EAS and the Body for Life challenge, yes I did do it and it works if you can live on protein powder and chicken breast)anywhooo, I of course click "delete" as I do with the all the other adverts and tempting sales notices and it got me thinking........Impressive I know.
Well I freakin' HATE Mondays!! Garfield and I are soul mates for this fact alone.

I wondered why. It's a new beginning, the start of a routine, I should be able to set goals and actually make it through at least one day, but nay, I don't want to get up, don't want to work out I have somewhat of a food hangover from my Sunday of eating junk, sitting around, no exercise and not enough water etc etc. The last thing I want is to go to the gym at my usual class time since the choices are Total conditioning (translate to:are you ready to throw up in the push up position and then drop your face in it 20 more times?) or FIT (translate to: do lunges and squats on this bosu ball for the next hour whilst pushing dumbbells and bars at all angles)If you think they sound easy you obviously haven't been!!!
So....today whilst brushing 6 inches of snow off my car (in snow boots)I decided I'd at least throw my trainers in the car in case I got the urge to work out.
I dropped off kids and went tanning, cos let's face it, even fat looks better tan then decided to hit the 10am Spin.
Yeah, I know, I'm a rock star!!! I worked hard and it felt so good. I admit my Sunday takes it's toll but I made a good choice and I am happy.
So thanks Shawn for the encouragement and to quote Bill "If you show up to the gym and do a half a.. workout, it's better than not showing up at all."
Sometimes you just gotta show up :)
Have a great Monday.

Who Knew?

Jeans weigh 2lbs!!!
Unlike my usual "weigh in" pants that are only .8lbs!
Gotta tell ya, it truly sucks to see the scale go up. When I think of all the things I said no to this week, I wonder how it is possible. I blamed the pants but with my 1.4lb up and a pant weight reduction for my jeans, (do the math) I still went up.
:-( I'm officially getting called fatty by my ww buds all week.
Hi Ho, it's off to the gym I go.

The great depression.

No I'm not about to shoot myself!
I'm referring to the poor economic crisis in the 40's. I hear people comparing our times to then but of course we are not that bad.....yet.
One of the things I notice in my old Grandpa,that stems from that time is the inability to throw things away.
So what am I supposed to do with all these Superbowl leftovers. You know there's nothing of any nutritional value whatsoever and yet it pains me to get rid.
Help.....20, 30 , 80 points are calling me from the fridge.

Just like a 3 year old!!

I got all excited over a gold star!!!
It's my first 5lb loss :)

It seems a small thing and it's a bit embarrassing standing up in front of a bunch of people who may have 100lb to loose but seriously, you can be a food addict and have eating disorders and not be huge.
I am learning this program as a way of life and this little star signifies I am doing it.
So far I learned:
1, I used to eat even more crap than I acknowledged.
2, I eat from boredom and stress, not hunger.
3, Fruit is my friend and I love it :)I'm talking, melon, kiwi, mango, good fruit.
4, You can loose lbs even when your sick as long as you stay in your points.
5, Exercise hard and eat the extra points, you earned them.
6, Progresso soup is your buddy, 0 or 1 point per serving.
7, Not having guilt for eating something you like is how you don't eat more of it.
8, This is easily something I could live on forever.
9, Having friends, support and accountability is the shoulder we all need.
10, Feeling good makes us better looking!!!!

So it's official, I'm at "H" which where I'm from is refered to as "aitch" so feel free to call me "aitch"

This is what the devil looks like!

My son Curt!! 6'2", 170lbs, 8% body fat.
Lives on a diet of Mountain Dew, Club crackers, cheese whiz and cookies.
He feels the need to make them just as I'm preparing dinner, starving and of course when I eat one he reminds me it's 100 points.
GET BACK SATAN!!

Your gonna waste those?

Someone once told me fruit lasts longer in the fridge. True! that would be because nobody actually looks for it and it stays there forever. I have thrown so much fruit away over the years that I decided to be like my Mum and have a fruit bowl out for anyone to help themselves to. No one has really been doing this so today I found myself throwing away a bunch of oranges and replacing them with new fruit.
This is when Ronan says "your gonna waste my favorite apples on a display?"
That explains allot.
I admit that in the past my fruit has been orange or green, thus matching beautifully my decor but I really did intend on it being eaten.
So help yourselves everyone.

I'm all about emergency prep.

Have you got a 72 hour kit?
I have realised that despite my best intentions, sometimes you just want something, NOW!!!! So I have built the most fabulous emergency prep kit that includes all things yummy under 2 points. I plan to add to it with suggestions.

I LOVE the ww ice cream bars with oreo, doesn't taste low fat at all.
I'm sorry that not everyone can have a case of Caballo Negro Zero on hand, luckily I have an "in" with one of the bosses :)It's not available to all yet, but watch this space.

half way to H.

I'm planning on breaking my goals into 3 parts.H.O.T.
Part 1 (H) would be my 5lb required by weight watchers and as of yesterday I am half way there. Not too shabby!!!
Part 2 (O)is another 5lb which would take me to where I am not disgusted with myself, making me a HO! That will be a challenge but at least I'll be back to wearing smoking hot clothes and everyone wishing they were me :)
Part 3 (T) will be my final 5 bonus lbs, if I get here I'll be dang HOT. tst don't touch.
I would like to maintain in between Ho and Hot status so watch this space.

The picture of my hunny is just eye candy, he's already HOT!!

Just Like Oprah!

Well minus the money, homes, personal chefs etc etc, oh yes and I'm white!
I'm referring to yo yo weight gain/loss.

I found myself in a desperate attempt to dress my cute "tom boy" in some clothes we both liked. I figured the "rock star" look, with black and some sparkle with boots etc might work for her when she observantly pointed out, as only a loving 7 year old can, that her jeans were very skinny. I replied, "I know, they are supposed to be, just like Mummy's" at which point she shares, yours aren't skinny!
Dingdingding!!

So here I am again looking at my weight gain and wondering how and why I get here every other year or so. I fluctuate 10lbs but it effects me tremendously.
I am bravely sharing my pics for all you saying "puuleeeese"

2002

2003

2005

2006

2008

I feel very positive about this weight watcher program since my sister in law lost my entire body weight on it.


Julias Before and After Pics

I feel lucky that my starting weight is still within my "healthy" range and if I lost 10% of my body weight (WW recommended first goal)I would be at my High school, Wedding,and ideal weight. The fact is, I can't fit in my clothes, I hate shopping, I feel disgusting and I'm a cow to be around with all this negative vibe.
So wish me luck people, I have a serious addiction to all things salty.

That's a big OOOPS!!

So it's day 1 and I'm thinking I'm all that with my 5 point breakfast and hardcore gym class earning me extra points ( even though that secret is saved for week 2, I have friends in the previously fat places so, yeah that's 4 points for me)I'm not hungry and so I make a controlled decission to pick up my favorite Chicken Salad from Rubio's. (Grilled chicken, chopped lettuce and cabbage, salsa, a few chopped chips in it, a little shredded cheese and a dressing of some sort) So I'm guessing with the aid of my new handy dandy pocket guide about 9 points plus dressing.
Ding Ding, correct it was 9 but when I got home and looked it up, the dressing alone is 8 points.
So that's my lesson for day 1.
DRESSING ON THE SIDE!!!